Want to Leave a Stench Behind? 5 Perfumes to Make You Stink On Purpose

A long time ago, in a universe far far away from our contemporary world, somebody realized people didn’t shower much (probably because they didn’t have showers) and they reeked. Basically. So that brilliant genius created perfume, as a means to the glorious end of making somebody smell nice, like flowers, fruits or summer rain blessing green heavenly pastures. And then everybody looked at that genius and decided they wanted more. And this is how an industry was born.

Joke aside, the history of perfumes is quite interesting to study and, as creepy as it is, the movie Perfume: The Story of a Murderer from 2006, touches some relevant points: people want to smell good as it seems others around them like to feel around their noses fine fragrances. However, some people just want to leave a stench behind and stink on purpose, and the industry jumped at their calling and created some…unique fragrances that can may blow your mind and your olfactory sensors. Like it’s not enough to not shower for a week, you have to wear a signature stench to be cool. So let’s see 5 perfumes to make you stink on purpose and maybe to use when you’re planning to be the only one in the audience at the next big rock concert you don’t want to share with the rest of the population.

5. Bordello Perfume Oil

Want to smell like a… professional? Or like you’ve just spent the last two hours in a Game of Thrones -ish W*-House? Perfect, because this perfume oil seems to be unisex and if you are curious enough to read the Amazon reviews, the first and the most appraising comes from a gentleman. The company – Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab – seems to have quite the success with this fragrance, described by the customers as a “Bold blend of fruit and booze”.

4. Vulva

Seriously, you want us to get into details? The title and description are self – explanatory enough and even too detailed. Not that we’d frown upon peoples’ tastes in fragrances but among the perfumes to make you stink on purpose, this one has to be the king of all fashion “statements”. For the sake of mankind, we hope this is unisex, too.

3. Lobster

Now, the Demeter Fragrance Library is probably the best place in the world where you can find a perfume to suit your tastes and needs, be them reeking of curry, shoes, pizza and so on. But this one with the Lobster Fragrance has something interesting to it. Say you buy this. Every time you feel like spending your month payment on a single lobster dinner, you sprinkle yourself with some of this perfume and pufff! cravings are gone. Together with your date, but that is not for us to judge. If you can eliminate food cravings by wearing dedicated perfumes (there are the ones with meat, hamburgers, sushi, barbeque and bacon, among others), this may turn into a revolutionary diet.

2. Fresh Cannabis

Make sure no cop smells you accidentally, as you might have some explaining to do regarding your taste in fragrances. Otherwise, it is perhaps the best perfume to wear in a club to pick – up people (some you like and cohorts of stoners you might not like so much) asking you for a joint, but hey, it’s a price to pay to coolness. This fragrance, however, can make you stink like a skunk so the picking – up plan may turn into a Forever alone meme on the Internet.

1. Cthulhu

Because why not, people? Why not wear a Cthulhu scent, among all the perfumes that make you stink on purpose? There is one about human secretions and bodily fluids we didn’t focused on, as we thought Vulva was enough. But Cthulhu is for the initiated, the special, the visionary. How can you get the honor to reek like a fictional horrific ancient oceanic monster, besides asking H.P. Lovecraft himself during a seance? Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab has the answer for you. And for $17.50, you’d better smell like Cthulhu so good, you would creep the soul of Lovecraft if he was alive.

Well we hope we gave you some pretty ideas on how to choose perfumes to make you stink on purpose. While that Bordello thing doesn’t sound bad, our hearts were gained by the sea monster. What would you like to wear? You know what, don’t answer that…

 

Dental Disasters: The Celebrities Who Looked Better With Their Mouths Shut

No one is entirely safe from dental disasters, are they? However, if you were rich and famous you would probably do something about your teeth, wouldn’t you? Some of the following celebrities did get dental work carried out but some of them decided to carry on with their bad smile.

Amy Winehouse

Celebrity Dental Disasters

[Read more…]

What Are You Playing With? 5 Fantasy Series Inspired Board Games

It is no news that in the last years, science fiction and fantasy as genres conquered the world of literature, cinema, visual arts and Internet fun. Adapting fantasy written series for the silver screen and for television is a common trend and it made billions of dollars world – wide, while collectibles, fanfic and inspired-everything gathered also billions of fans.

Today we will talk about fantasy series inspired board games, as once you turned off the TV or left the cinema, you still long for spending more time in a certain universe and board games creators understood that better than anybody. While Game of Thrones card games and board games and extensions are internationally famous and quite complex to play, there are, of course, other book series that got adapted and became entertaining board games to keep you hooked on the universe some brilliant writer managed to create. Here are only five of them.

1. Terry Pratchett’s Discworld: Ankh-Morpork

If you are not familiar with Pratchett’s universe, you really should, as it is considered the funniest fantasy series of all times. It all happens on the Discworld and the characters and stories kept people hooked on the author’s humor and writing style for years. The Ankh – Morpork board – game takes place in the city – state with the same name, you are given a certain character and personality and your goal is to reach your game goals, while trying to prevent your opponents from reaching theirs. It is an incredible journey in one of the vastest, most mind – blowing fantasy universes ever written in this world.

2. Harry Potter Mystery At Hogwarts Game

Now the famous Harry Potter series inspired a lot of board and card games and this one resembles Clue a lot, as it transports you into the Harry Potter universe, while you have to solve mysteries and work your way through a very compelling story. It is a strategy game based on classic mystery solving older games, but it deserves its place in the list of fantasy series inspired board games because it is exciting and can keep you entertained for hours.

3. The Lord of The Rings Adventure Board Game

In case you didn’t know, there are also two The Hobbit board games but the Lord of The Rings comes in many shapes and challenges. In case you are addicted to Tolkien’s universe, you can buy them all and play them all, as this particular one can be integrated in the Hobbit series. It may take you months to build the entire complex realm, play and try to win, as the rules are complex and not always well understood by the players and it takes a while to figure out what is going on. An everlasting challenge, we might say.

4. The Hunger Games: Training Days

The Hunger Games books and movies are a contemporary success and it was only logical they would end up as board games. This one is quite appreciated by the players, although you can also find other board and card games inspired by the series. This challenges you as a Tribute and pushes your skills enough to learn strategy and survive the tasks and even win a few rounds. It is well – made and seems to be favored by families and large groups of friends.

5. Twilight Board Game

Of course there are Twilight Saga inspired board games! Based on the popular books and movie series, this is a trivia game, not a strategy or mystery one, so if you are a true dedicated fan, you will win by answering questions related to the movie. Unfortunately, if you browse users’ reviews on Amazon or dedicated sites, you will find out they were a bit disappointed about this game, as it wasn’t as challenging as they would have hoped and it seems it has some additional questions and tasks that are poorly related to the Twilight universe. Others had a lot of fun with it, however, so it all depends perhaps on what your expectations are.

There are, of course, other fantasy series inspired board games for you to play, independent novels even, not to mention board games inspired by comic books and superhero franchises. It is lovely to see people so engaged with a story, a realm, a plot or some characters, that they just want them to become constant parts of their lives.

3 Fake Languages in Books and Movies You Should Learn

One of the greatest things that could happen to humanity was science – fiction and fantasy genres, no matter the sub-genres and branches and cross-genres alternatives. It doesn’t even matter you are thinking about movies, books, short stories, theater plays or boardgames. It doesn’t even matter if you are a fan or not, as if you are, you probably know more than we could ever write in an article and if you’re not, you still know  a lot of things, intentionally or accidentally, because in the last years, fantasy, science – fiction and fiction at its best invaded the cinemas, took over bookshelves and corrupted television, only to gain billions of followers world – wide. And it is so awesome, it can’t be truly expressed into words.

Besides monumental stories, incredible realms and immortal characters, box – office success and plots that will keep us glued to the books’ pages or the cinema seats for years on end, these sci – fi and fantasy productions also brought with them new languages, dialects, strange tongues, unknown and unheard before words and phrases. And some of them became not only famous, but found a place into our common language and now are so popular, you can even find tutorials and dictionaries to help you study. There are at least three fake languages in books and movies you should learn, if not to be the coolest geek in the neighborhood, at least to understand what the other cooler geeks are saying to you. Learning Chinese? Everybody can do it. Try these and then consider yourself a linguistics badass! 

1. Sindarin (Elvish) – Tolkien, Jackson and David Salo

sindarin language

This is the language spoken by the Elves in Middle Earth and it was Tolkien who initially invented it in his Lord of the Rings trilogy and the other books he wrote related to the same universe. They say the writer only made up around 400 words and it was director Peter Jackson who collaborated with famous linguist David Salo – an expert in Sindarin – in order to develop the language to become usable in conversation.

So… Pedig edhellen? This means “Do you speak Elvish” and if you don’t, you should start. Beware, it is quite hard and complicated. Luckily for you, there are plenty of resources. You can start with an extensive Guide to Learning Elvish or just memorize some useful Elvish words and phrases to get along with the other Sindarin speakers.

2. Dothraki – Martin and David J. Peterson

dothraki

If you don’t speak Dothraki yet, you’re not a true Game of Thrones fan, not to mention you should have spoken High Valyrian by now. Dothraki language is fabulous linguist David J. Peterson’s creation and it is among the most popular fake languages in books and movies you should learn, because it seems that everybody speaks it. If you don’t believe us, check out the Internet for the famous love statements between Drogo and Daenerys (written in both English and Dothraki on wedding rings and stuff like that).

It is so cool that there are lots of places available for you to learn Dothraki idioms and phrases. So learn Dothraki fast and maybe anha vazhak yeraan thirat.

3. Banana Language – Tagalog, Italian, Spanish, English and Whatever

minions language

Don’t you speak Minion (or the Banana Language) yet? You should be ashamed of yourself. We are, of curse, talking about the Despicable Me series, the animation which got the world addicted to the Minions and their messed – up language too.

YouTube is full of Minion scenes, the Internet got over itself in trying to explain how Banana Language resembles Filipino and a lot of other ones (including Latin languages and ones of Asian origin), in a bundle of phrases and idioms that are now internationally famous. Unlike the Sindarin and Dothraki, Minions’ language is rather limited (as it is hard to write this article in full Banana, while we’re sure somebody can adapt this text to Elvish, for instance), but it sounds awesome nonetheless. There are dozens of Minion – English Translation dictionaries, but one of the most extended resources can be found here.

These are the three fake languages in books and movies you should learn to keep your mind active and be considered the coolest geek in town. Of course, if you want to become a real intellectual and a vast fictional languages speaker, we also recommend you to start learning Klingon (in case you don’t already have a doctoral thesis in Klingon linguistics), Fremen (the language created by Frank Herbert for the Dune Universe) or even Na’vi (yes, the alien language in Avatar!). Happy learning new languages (as human ones are so boring)! Kampai!

Some Interesting Facts about Angry Birds

Angry Birds has become a cultural phenomenon in recent years. The immense popularity of the pig bashing game had even led to me digging up some incredible statistics and vaguely interesting facts about it.

An Astonishing Number of Downloads

Angry Birds Facts

[Read more…]