The 15 Essential South Park Episodes

South Park, in my humble opinion, is one of the greatest things to ever happen to television. It made Comedy Central what it is today, it continues to push the boundaries of what can be shown on television, and it’s also really, really funny. Here are the funniest episodes in the show’s history, plus some bonus material.

Season 1: Cartman Gets an Anal Probe

Here we have the episode that started it all. The groundbreaking pilot that was filmed using cut and paste stop motion animation, the only episode not to be animated on a computer. We’re introduced to the characters: The football jock Stan, the smartypants Kyle, the perpetually dying Kenny, and of course, the racist, evil, foul, bad tempered, conniving fatass, Cartman. The kids are at the bus stop when Cartman tells them of an awful dream he had where he was abducted by aliens and probed. Despite evidence to the contrary, some of it VERY compelling…

Oh hey guys what's up? Fishsticks for dinner last night?

…Cartman still believes it to be just that: a dream. The So called “visitors” up the ante by turning cows inside out and kidnapping Kyle’s little brother Ike. [Read more...]

How to Quit Smoking [Amusing Video]

By Michael McLaughlin

Quitting smoking? Fear not, it’s easy – I’ve done it lots of times.

No, seriously, I’m such an advocate of quitting smoking that I made this video that may or may not inspire you to do the same!

The patch, the gum, the Zyban, or any of that other crap is OUT. Cold Turkey baby! It’s the best way, because trust me, then and only then do you really experience yourself quitting and then actually adapt to it. You build more willpower in those first few days of cold turkey than you ever will by easing off “painlessly.” Oh yeah, and of course, if you’re on the patch and then cheat by smoking, you could actually have a heart attack – COLD TURKEY BABY!

But some people experience some not so pleasant things: constipation, insomnia, irritability, crying for no reason among other wonderful withdrawal symptoms – not fun. But hey – they fade – and pretty quickly too.

So go ahead, check out my music video on quitting the habit! You’ll laugh. You’ll cry. You’ll want to join the leagues of born again anti-smokers who just can’t bear to be in the same room with a smoker and take pleasure in feeling superior and indignant to the offenders!

Can You Tell How These Logos Were Made?

What do you get when you cross the Death Star from Star Wars with a jigsaw puzzle? If your answer is “the Wikipedia logo,” you either made these pictures or you have a really wicked way of thinking.

A creative anonymous artist made fun illustrations by observing that if you combine different objects, you can get some of the well known logos of products or companies.

[Read more...]

The Hand

The human hand is one of the most complicated and delicate pieces of machinery there is. Millions upon millions of tiny parts all work together to make the hand work. We can do most anything with our hands, and certainly couldn’t do a lot without them. Yet what would we do if our hands gained sentience?

It’s not unprecedented, of course. What are sock puppets but hands with masks on? The Addams family had a pet hand that flew around and did some crazy stuff. In Harry Potter, a magical hand strangled Wormtail for incompetence, and Eric Cartman’s hand played a pretty convincing Jennifer Lopez for a time.

It's all in the lips

So, think about it. What would happen to you if your hands suddenly came to life one day? First of all, you’d have some explaining to do. Odds are you’ve done some pretty gross things with your hands, and gotten some gross stuff on them. [Read more...]

Zeus’ 5 Most Bizarre Conquests

In Ancient Greek mythology Zeus was king of the gods and, by and large, did a pretty good job of it. Referred to as father even by those gods he didn’t have a hand in conceiving, he overthrew his baby-eating father Cronus and shared the world with his elder brothers Poseidon (who got the world’s waters) and Hades (who was put in charge of the dead and thus the Underworld). However, for all his godliness he had one fatal flaw: women. This, perhaps understandably, pissed off his wife Hera no end, especially considering the irony of her presiding over marriage and the union of the marriage bed. But what were Zeus’s more unusual dalliances? He was a god, after all, and a few dirty weekends disguised as business trips weren’t exactly going to cut it. [Read more...]