Say My Name! 5 Children Who Are Going to Hate Their Life When They Grow Up

Every year, some very curious people start making surveys to measure up people’s imagination, sick sense of humor, passive – aggressive tendencies and  their well dissimulated desire of taking revenge with the world. No, it’s not about psychological testing en masse, although it would not be such a bad idea, but the annual “How did you named your new-born this year” research. This has been going on for a while and besides the names that sound pretty normal and even mainstream, so to speak, every year these studies reveal that some parents actually managed to screw their children’s lives in a manner that would make Sigmund Freud jealous for not thinking about this first: pick a name that will not only haunt the child for the rest of his or her life, but turn the child into a constant subject of mockery, abuse and nervous breakdowns.

To be fair to our cause, this is not about some celebrities’ children names, as we all know how Kal – El (son of Cage) will develop, or how little miss Apple (daughter of Poltrow) will face at some point some trademark infringement law case in the unfortunate circumstance of ever wanting to sell phones. We are talking about those anonymous mothers and fathers everywhere in the country who are so cool, naming their children James or Diana was too little, they had to come up with better than this. So we picked up five contenders among the children who are going to hate their life when they grow up, solely based on their names.

1. Google – You feel lucky, punk?

google

Imagine this conversation in school:

“Teacher, where do I find some reliable references on Mark Twain’s works for my essay?”

“Ask Google”

Imagine this conversation in adulthood

“Google, google me the recipe for roasted turkey, please”

And this is just the tip of the iceberg. Imagine being asked questions all the time and being a constant subject of interminable mockery. He will end up changing his name into Jon Doe and flee the country.

2. Lovelle – Shake it like you mean it

lovelle

You know how they say a name pretty much pre-defines and pre-determins your entire destiny? Now tell me you don’t read this name and see it in neon lights next to a dancing pole. Maybe I am the crazy one, but Danielle was just right and I hope dear little angel Lovelle will become a neuroscientist.

3. Hurricane. Definitely one of the children who are going to hate their life

hurricane

In the Lord’s year 2013, some parents decided to name their new-born son Hurricane. Now if the boy’s first cries sounded exactly like the Scorpions band lead vocalist, everything is just dandy, as the boy will become the next superstar in rock music. But if you called your child like this just because he was born during the hurricane, survived the hurricane or was conceived during the hurricane, this token of “remember the time” is quite cruel.

4. Shoog. Because 2012 was a shoog year for girls

Why give the child a name which might turn ugly if mocked in a nickname, when you can cut the BS from the start and name her (because Shoog is a her) directly odd, just so you cut everybody’s wings before they start finding name alternatives in high school? Little miss Shoog, we truly hope you won’t become one of those children who hate their life and none of your future friends and colleagues will ever ask you how on Earth did your parents come with this… sound… of a name.

5. Leviathan

Seriously people? It’s 2013 and you name your boy Leviathan? There are so many ways this kid’s life is going to be screwed up, we can’t even begin to count them. He’ll go around by the name of Levi, identify himself as a descendant of the Levi Strauss genealogical tree and wear denim for the rest of his life. There’s no other possible way to beat his parents’ creativity.

There you have my personal selection of children who are going to hate their life because of their names. There are so many more out there. So many and so weird, one might come to believe that Kal – El isn’t that bad after all.

Hate ‘em, Hate ‘em, Wouldn’t Want to Date Them? 6 Male Stars That Got Better With Age

Since fabulous George Takei managed to shame the entire male population aged 18 to 80 with his push-ups show live at Conan, every journalist and every entertainment website jumped around screaming, as ladies, you seem to have forgotten that you may wipe an invisible drool (it’s quite visible, don’t you worry about that, we all know it’s there) every time social media waves and flashes before your eyes some photos of Ryan Gosling or Tom Hiddleston or another young and fresh piece of superstar, but it’s the old ones that truly have the hots, while some of them still have the stamina, while a surprising bunch of actors got better with age.

So who wouldn’t want to date them, the old gods, instead of the new ones? There was a time when you could ask a woman who’s her favorite mature guy she secretly dreams of, and they would all tell you without blinking: Sean Connery. Former Mr. Bond had indeed enticed the imagination of many generations of women, but since time doesn’t stand still, some of the young ones you were so infatuated with 10 – 15 years ago…reached themselves a certain age. So, ladies? Hate them, hate them, wouldn’t want to date them? Let’s see six male stars that got better with age.

1. George Clooney doesn’t have an age

george clooney

Mark my words, ladies, your daughters will have the same hots for him just as you did for Connery. What can we say? He is indeed a hot guy. Over fifty and according to the rumors, still a bachelor and not soon to change his Facebook status otherwise. Which is bad for the guys, actually. We will keep on sleeping with one eye open, while the ladies will check him and a few others in the category “would want to date them before it’s too late.”

2. Chris Noth definitely got better with age

chris noth

Many men out there may have hated the guts of the Sex and the City show because it taught you ladies a lot of bad things (ready for ducking flowing rocks any time now) but in all fairness, Mr. Noth is a subject of envy for the guys and some moans for the gals, as he doesn’t seem to develop a beer belly (quite common among men almost 60) and that is just not fair…

3. Lenny Kravitz looks age in the eyes and spits on it

Lenny Kravitz

This guy would make even the Highlander get green in jealousy, but time seems to be on the musician’s side. And he couldn’t just stick to music, he had to show up in movies too, which left the entire male populace poorer with at least one hope of surviving the 49 – 50 barrier. And in ten years from now, he will still be on the list of male stars who got better with age.

4. Sting actually gets younger

sting

This Police-man seems to defy all logic, physics and natural laws when it comes to looks and charms. He makes easily any top ten hotties almost 60 years old and who wouldn’t want to date them? Or at least a few of them, anyway, Sting in front and center? Men secretly wish that one day Sting will share with them all the formula of the “forever young, hot and slim” potion he is taking.

5. Brad Pitt will look even better in another 50 years

brad-pitt

The Gen – Y female representatives may not remember him well (if at all) in his first years of career, when he showed up in the iconic movie Thelma and Louise looking like the male version of the Playboy bunny, only to turn out not only a great actor, but also a hot stud? Guys everywhere are planning to rioting against him, not because he personally ruined their chances with Angelina Jolie, but because he is still making their girlfriends sigh. Imagine your daughters sighing in another ten years, ladies and gentlemen.

6. Johhny Depp is immortal. Period

johnny depp

Let’s hear it ladies, you all know he is somehow immortal and getting even better with age, just like wine, isn’t it? Well, we have to give you that, Captain Sparrow seems to actually getting younger, in spite of the fact that he reached fifty years old. But as the situation looks, he will be around long enough to fuel your dreams.

Now let’s be honest, who wouldn’t want to date these five male stars that got better with age? And others equally better looking at 50 or at 60 or at 70 years old? For the gentlemen, there is only one advice if they want to make up for the lost time: follow Mr. Takei’s example: 100 push – ups a day, get famous, get rich and get brilliantly funny. The rest will come too…

The Horrible Christmas Cards You Don’t Want to Receive

We all love to get cheerful, seasonal Christmas cards through the post, don’t we? However, what we really, really done want is one of these horrible Christmas cards. Seriously, if you get a card like these ones then it is time to get new friends or buy a new family or something.

The Naked Family Card

Horrible Christmas Cards and The Naked Family Card

[Read more...]

Have an Appetite? How About These 4 Scary Restaurants in the World?

Remember famous King Leonidas (of the 300 movie, of course) and that powerful line that was going like “tonight we dine in Hell?” Well actually that line inspired this article, not because we are going to show you some very weird restaurants in the world that you probably may have heard about already, but because we aim to show you some very scary restaurants in the world that would pretty much classify in the category of “eat once, remain scarred for life.”

Before we proceed, however, we should remind you that by scary, we don’t mean only the thrill and the chill you get down your spine when entering the place for the first time, but also some confusing feelings (ranging from fear, to heart-attacking surprise, to visceral disgust) you might experience while you’re there. So if you’re ready to face some horror and some terror and some insane ways of eating, let’s buckle up and take the ride to four scary restaurants in the world.

1. Marton Theme Restaurant, Taiwan

marton theme restaurant

This one you probably know by know, as it became a famous chain with a concept that can still give people chill down their spines. If you’re that kind of person who feels hepatitis creeping in his or her system every time you see a lonely strand of hair around or in your plate, The Toilet Restaurant is not for you. It is for the other ones who find it actually exhilarating to sit on toilet – like seats and eat from toilet – like bowls and plates. Disgusting? You bet your hospitalization money on it.

2. Cannibalistic Sushi, Japan

Cannibal Restaurant

If eating sushi was a pretty challenge for you, imagine eating delicious Japanese raw fish and dishes like sashimi for instance, all wrapped up in a dough that gets the shape of a female human body. This is called Nyotaimori and you basically sit around the corpse, cut in in pieces and eat it. Not for the fain of heart, to say the least. The “body” is edible and there is also some red sauce dripping out of it at every cut, because the Japanese have this soft spot for realism.

3. Alcatraz ER, Japan

alcatraz ER

Of course, Japan. What do you get when you go out to eat in a restaurant and end up in a hybrid of a hospital and a prison? Maybe this was Leonidas’s idea of dining in Hell? This one scary restaurant in the world took things up a notch (because Japan) and figured there are already prison – like restaurants and hospital – themed restaurants, why not creeping the living soul out of you? Food is served in shapes and forms one can’t really grasp (severed penis, there, are you happy now?), in cell rooms, right after you made a blood oath (actually they test your blood type), were cuffed and sent to your dirty corner to enjoy dinner, that if you still have a stomach inside your body.

4. Ninja, New York

ninja new york

Maybe less scary, but definitely entertaining, especially if you have minor heart problems or you’re the type who screams at every scene in every horror movie. Ninja Restaurant has a bit of a scare for you: first you walk through some dark, creepy low lit labyrinth, if you’re lucky you get a prison cell all for yourself, and if your nerves aren’t still shattered, here comes the fun part: your waiters are all ninjas, dress-up and skills, and they will do anything in their abilities to make your blood rush through your veins, as these boys are full of tricks.

Now, if you really want to get some chills, we also recommend you to try Lainio Snow Village Ice Restaurant in Finland, as it will give you enough freezing chills to keep you frisky for the entire year. And remember, eating and getting scared to death are very much in the trends right now and of course, you can always choose other types of thrills, like eating in one of the many suspended at high altitudes scary restaurants in the world, or in complete darkness, or having sharks looking in your plate through a glass window… Bon appetit!

True Bromance: 5 Actors Couples Who Make Very Close Friends

If you are at least a bit curious about celebrities personal lives (and this is not about paparazzi style interest in the latest divorce or the future cheating adventure) you may have wondered a few times what do these people do in their spare time, except for showing up in the news for all sorts of sordid reasons? Who are they friends with? Who are they spending time with? What are their hobbies?

Of course, if you are young, hot and famous, the media probably will be interested more in who you’re dating than who is your best buddy (and occasionally follow you in the park while you have a hot – dog), so this time we will take a look on some celebrity actors who share a true bromance with other actors and have what we might call a “normal” life which includes best friends and sports games buddies.

1. Ben Affleck & Matt Damon

Now this is not a new one. They are friends from childhood, attended college together (though in different grades, as Matt is two years older than Ben), shared an Oscar Award and international fame and glory and it seems that they are best buddies, while their true bromance looks like being strong and never fading. Of course, Matt Damon was spotted having couple dinners with Robert Downey, Jr. + One and while nobody managed to accurately trace back the beginning of their beautiful friendship, we just hope that Ben is not jealous.

2. Patrick Stewart And Ian McKellen

patrick stewart ian mckellen

Ahhh! Captain Picard and Gandalf are the Internet’s favorite true bromance, as these two are just hilarious and incredibly close. And when you see them wearing those hats, your faith in humanity must get restored in an instant. Apparently these two bundles of awesomeness and immortal friendship and love call each other “Sir”, while having no trouble in pulling pranks one on the other or sharing a few bags of garbage to prove that being together with your best buddy is more important that the landscape you found yourselves into.

3. George Clooney and Brad Pitt

george-clooney-brad-pitt

This is not that kind of close, tight, “call me every evening to tell me goodnight” type of relationship, but they do share a close relation and apparently, a lot of affection and the constant need to pull pranks on each other. George and Brad see each other as often as their schedules allow them to, but maybe this is that type of friendship when you don’t need to hold each other every day to still have that spark and keep the romance going for decades.

4. Great Gatsby and Spiderman: True Bromance for 25 years

leo di caprio tobey maguire

Of course we are talking abut Leonardo DiCaprio and Tobey Maguire, two actors who not so long ago shared the silver screen in Leo’s Great Gatsby, but who also share a personal story, as they know each other for 25 years. They met at an audition and starting then, they came a long way to fame and fortune, only to share that special relationship only guys can have: chat about basketball and look to each other for advice, while Leo seem to play the “awesome uncle” to Tobey’s kids.

5. Benedict Cumberbatch and James McAvoy

cumberbatch mcavoy

The U.K. media knows this even better than us, these two share quite the friendship, to the extent that Cumberbatch, England’s sex symbol and one of the hottest, most talented actors of his generation declared that his friend James McAvoy is far better looking and even “gorgeous on screen.” Ah, a guy’s honesty when complimenting another guy… priceles…

We also heard that Ed Norton and Mark Ruffalo share more than a Incredible Hulk costume, they also share a great friendship. So wasn’t it odd to have Mark take over the Hulk and turn it into a smashing hit? How did Ed feel about this? Intriguing… However, If you have knowledge of other examples of true bromance, don’t be shy in sharing, we always love a good story.