The Best and Worst Grammar Police Examples

I’m really quite nervous about typing this. I feel apprehensive because the Grammar Police are everywhere! When you write about bad grammar, they crawl out of the woodwork to study every word and punctuation mark. Still, if you find any mistakes here, I’ll just pretend that they were made with a big dollop of irony. Without any further wait, let’s dive into our list of the best and worst Grammar Police examples.

The People and Their Spelling Fail

Spelling Fails and the Grammar Police

Can I propose a simple yet useful suggestion to the English speaking world? We should just spell they’re, there and their the same freaking way. I realize that learning how to spell each of these three short words correctly doesn’t seem like a huge task. But, it really would make this world a better place to live in.

The Double Grammar Fail

Best and Worst Grammar Police Examples

The only thing worse than a Grammar Nazi correcting you is the said Grammar Nazi making incorrect corrections. Thankfully, the person correcting the corrector didn’t make any mistakes. We could have been caught up in a never-ending series of correction notes. Each note would become more pedantic than the previous one.

The Pumps Fail

The Best and Worst Grammar Police Examples

The most interesting thing about this sign is that pre-pay pumps exist somewhere in the world. Why didn’t anyone tell me about this before now? I have no idea what liquids or solids are pumped out of said pumps. If the product is payed for before I arrive, you won’t find me complaining.

The Passed Away Grammar

Best and Worst Grammar Police Examples

A lot of people seem to have trouble telling the difference between past and passed. This infraction appears to be a huge area of concern for Grammar Police all over the planet. Surely, this should be the subject of international conferences and documentaries. However, I believe it is safe to say that a note telling you that a colleague passed away isn’t really an appropriate place to discuss the subject.

The Grammar Police Fail

Best and Worst Grammar Police Examples

Even the Grammar and Spelling Police make mistakes. In this case, we can see how two different agents of these fine organisations made mistakes of their own. Correcting other people’s mistakes all day long is a tough and tiring job. But, someone has to do it!

The Backwards Swastika

Best and Worst Grammar Police Examples

The Grammar Police and Grammar Nazis are pretty much the same. If you fall foul of either party, you will soon realize all of your misplaced commas and erroneous apostrophes. What about the Graffiti Police, though? In this case, a member of the organization was a bit too quick to write a reply when he found a backwards swastika.

The Terrible Grammar Fail

Worst Grammar Police Examples

To be honest, I failed the exams to join the Grammar Police. They offered me a position in the Superfluous Comma Squad. But, I felt like the role wouldn’t allow me to show off my full range of skills. Having said all of that, even I would need to jump in and make a citizen’s arrest on this awful speller. He may be suffering a serious case of unrequited love (she isn’t remotely interested in you, buddy), but that doesn’t excuse horrible pile of errors.

The Punctuate Fail

Punctuation Fails and the Grammar Police

Have you spotted any of my deliberate mistakes yet? I bet you haven’t. Anyway, this is a pretty good example of the power of commas. They save lives and prevent forest fires!

10 Funny Menu Items

Ordering a meal in a restaurant can be a nerve racking experience at times. It is made even worse when you have to make your choice from inexplicable and funny menu items like the 10 funny menu items on this list.

The Tart Waitress

Funny Menu Items

I have to admit, the rest of this menu looks pretty classy. I’m not stylish or cutting edge enough to have ever tried marinated artichokes. I wouldn’t recognize a piece of manzano cheese if it slapped me in the face. However, the elegance of the menu is let down by the promise of a tarty waitress.

The Weird Stuff

Funny Menu Items

I don’t know where to start with this funny menu. I do know that harsh fresh you is going to be my favorite insult from now on. The irritable scalloped kidney sounds more like a nasty disease than a menu item. It might be worth a try I suppose.

The Ice Dessert

Funny Menu Items

I’m a big fan of cheese cakes. I would be really tempted to have one as dessert in this place. However, the 10lb bag of ice might be a more tempting option. Are you expected to eat all that frozen water, or is it a sort of compress to put on your hugely bloated stomach after pigging out on wings and nuggets?

The God Menu

Funny Menu Items

Eating isn’t usually a religious experience. But, if you order God with vanilla from this restaurant it might well be.

The Crap Item

Funny Menu Items

So, you really like seafood, do you? I’m sure your arteries are grateful for this. If you really want to treat yourself to some sea based treats, why not add some crap onto it? The foot long option gives you more crap than you could possibly imagine.

The Weird Menu

Funny Menu Items

I don’t know which funny menu item sounds more appetizing here. I am a sucker for fried rolled up trousers. But the false dog-meat pork has got my mouth watering as well. Otherwise, I guess I’ll just need to be boring and settle for a plain old stewed gastric pig.

The Wikipedia Entry

Weird Menu Items 

Is there anything on Earth tastier than getting an unreliable internet encyclopedia? Then, you can pop it in a wok and stir frying the beejezus out of it. I think not.

The Boner Meat

Funny Menu Items

Err, I think I’ll stick to the scampi if you don’t mind. And another thing: who the hell eats chips (French fries) in pitta bread? That’s just about the worst thing I’ve ever seen on a menu. The chips and cheese sounds sort of tempting though, in a gooey, horribly sticky sort of a way.

The Irish Dinner

Funny Menu Items

If you have ever fancied eating a traditional Irish dinner, there apparently isn’t too much to it. Just pop a potato in the microwave, and line up a few beers.

The Fried Nonsense

Funny Menu Items

Perhaps the most difficult thing about eating in this restaurant is choosing between whether you want your nonsense fried or boiled. It’s a tough choice. I’m sure you will eventually be able to settle down to a lovely plate of nonsense.

The Best for Sale Signs for a Home

If you are currently interested in purchasing a home, then you probably keep an eye out for tempting for sale signs. Would any of these following signs be of interest to you? This is our list of the best for sale signs for a home.

The Not Haunted House Sign

The Best House for Sale Signs

It is always reassuring to see that the house you consider purchasing doesn’t have any unwanted spirits in it. I don’t know about you but when I go to view a property I always like to get the whole haunting issue out of the way as soon as it is polite to do so; usually, this is just after asking about the heating bills and parking rights.

The Painfully Honest Sign

Funny House for Sale Signs

Being honest in life is a good thing, it really is. Sure, it might cause you some problems along the way but you will feel a lot better about yourself if you adopt this ethical approach. However, you can correct me if I’m wrong here, but I can’t help thinking that there are times when it is possible to be just too honest.

The Baffling Sign

Crazy House for Sale Signs

Do you know what the strangest thing about this for sale sign is? It isn’t the fact that the price has plummeted so low from the initial $475,000 value. It isn’t even the fact that the owner just wants the bus fare out of the place. No, it is the fact that they are offering hot cider to prospective buyers. Who drinks hot cider anyway? Is that the turnkey item which will really ‘seal the deal’ in this offer?

The Mice Sign

Funny House for Sale Signs

When did including rodents with the purchase price of a house become a good thing? For some reason, I would have thought that haggling for them separately would be more dignified. But, what do I know about selling real estate?

The Croaking Owner Sign

The Best for Sale Signs for a Home

I have absolutely no idea what is going on here. This sign indicates that the owner is about to pass away and wants to sell his or her home. But, why would you even say that on a sign? Also, why does it say liver free? I guess I’ll never know the answers to these questions.

The Free Pizza Sign

House for Sale Signs

Let’s face it; the house you buy will probably be far and away the biggest investment you ever make. It will leave you with a crippling debt for decades to come and will have you gasping in pain every time the interest rate goes up even slightly. All of this means that you will need to be very careful about buying the right place based on cold, hard financial facts. Hey, would a free pizza help you make up your mind? Go on, then. It has pepperoni on it. No extra charge!

The Multiple For Sale Signs

Best House for Sale Signs

Some sort of inner real estate instinct is telling me that Belvedere Place isn’t somewhere I want to live. After all, everyone who lives there wants out of the blooming place. I guess this could be a nice place for you if you like to meet a lot of new neighbors all the time. No word on whether any of those houses are haunted or have mice though, eh?

Insane Cloud Formations to Take Your Breath Away

Have you ever looked up at the sky and had your breath taken away? Of course, you have. The sky is filled with amazing sights such as, well, clouds. You might not think that clouds are particularly exciting but the following insane cloud formations will change your mind.

The God Cloud

Cloud Formations

This photo recently caused a bit of a stir online recently, as it appears to show a face that some people claim is the face of God. Jeremy Fletcher is the chap who took this photo in England and certainly looks pretty awesome as well as a bit creepy.

The Bird Cloud

Insane Cloud Formations

This amazing cloud picture makes it look as though as some sort of giant bird taking off over the water. I have no idea what it all means. Is it some sort of harbinger of doom or is it a sign that we are about to set off on the journey to a brave new world? Or maybe it’s just a weird cloud formation.

The Lenticular Cloud

Amazing Cloud Formations

I don’t want to get all geeky and technical but this is what cloud experts call lenticular clouds. Personally, if I was in charge of naming clouds I would have called them “pancake clouds”, which is why I’m not trusted with important jobs like naming clouds. They tend to form near mountains such as, hey, Mount Fuji in Japan. People often mistake them for UFOs, although there is also the possibility that people also mistake UFOs for lenticular clouds, I guess.

Mammatus Clouds

Crazy Cloud Formations

It’s time for some more technical words now as we look at a spectacular mammatus cloud formation. This involves clouds with pouches hanging off the bottom of them and usually means that a thunderstorm is on the way. I have no idea why these ones are red, though.

Asperatus Cloud

Bizarre Cloud Formations

What the hell is happening to the sky in this picture? This is something known as an asperatus cloud formation to experts and as “a blooming weird big thing in the sky” to the rest of us. This type of insane cloud formation is so rare that it was only given its own classification in 2009. I bet you didn’t know that the world of cloud watching was as exciting and fast moving at this, did you?

Roll Cloud

Insane Cloud Formations

The roll cloud is another type of weird cloud formation that usually means that a massive thunderstorm will be along before too long.

The Shelf Cloud

Insane Cloud Formations

This stunning cloud formation is a shelf cloud and it is a variant of the previous type of cloud we just looked at. It looks kind of scary, huh? I get the feeling that a thunderstorm might be on the way.

The Rather Rude Cloud

Bizarre Cloud Formations

Who knew that the sky could flip the bird as well? This rather rude cloud was pictured in Scotland. Jeez, you don’t want to upset the clouds when you go there.

The Horse Cloud

Amazing Cloud Formations

I reckon this is a fake picture of a cloud. After all, when did you ever look up to the sky and see a giant horse up there? However, I think I will be keeping a closer eye on the clouds near me from now on.

6 Pieces of Advice for a Future Winner

Here are 6 pieces of advice for a future winner as how to work more efficiently and turn whatever you have to do into pleasure. Well I’m talking about a real job, or a business that you wanted to get into in the first place.

#1. Start doing something

6 Pieces of Advice for a Future Winner1

We all have friends who are constantly boasting about things like “I had the idea of creating something like Facebook first. Had I done something, I would have been rich by now.” This is a pathetic way of thinking. Not until you start doing something as a consequence of your initial idea, will your brilliant spark start shining. We’ve all got them, don’t we?

#2. Lack of time is never an excuse

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This is the most common excuse people use. Even though most people claim they’d love to open up a new business, or learn how to play an instrument, write a book or whatever, they can never find the time to actually do that! Come on, now, are you for real?

You don’t have to give up your job, you just have to use your spare time wisely. No more Internet, Facebook or Game of Thrones. Your idea is much more important. A few hours a week are more than enough to advance in whatever you want to do.

Once you start investing in something new, you’ll also realise whether this effusion is for real or not. If you lose your enthuziasm on the way, it means it was never meant to be.  So stop making up excuses, will you? You are the only one responsible for your dreams.

Moreover, the perfect timning will never just pop out of the blue. You’ll always be too young, or too old, or too poor, or too fat to go after your dream, if you postpone all the time.

#3. Meetings are toxic

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Meetings are a waste of time. They use abstract concepts insted of concrete ideas. They last too long and provide too little. They always deflect from the subject. There’s always someone present there who is keen on sharing his neverending opinions about subjects exterior to the business of the day.

Instead try applying something else: use a timer. When the alarm rings, the meeting is over. End of discussion. Also try calling less people to the meeting. Unfortunately the more the merrier rule doesn’t apply in this case. The meeting should always take place where the problem occured, not in an arid meeting room.

End with a solution and decide who’s in charge for implementing the solution.

#4. Sleep

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This is not an article discussing the lack of sleep. Nevertheless, it is generally known to turn people into stubborn hatable individuals. Moreover it affects creativity, optimism and your temper. The most balanced individual can turn into a hysterical ill-natured person once he’s tired.  Your being tired will eventually turn against you.

#5. Hire people who can write

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If you have to choose from several individuals, pick the one who can write. Despite  your working field, someone who can write is really useful. That’s because someone who’s got this talent has a clear had, and good communication skills. Nevermind the extrovert-introvert dihotomy. These people can just make things easier to understand. They can easily be in someone else’s shoes and they know what to ommit when carrying a message. What more coud you wish for?

#6. Don’t take your inspiration for granted

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We all have ideas. They are immortal by excelence. But inspiration on the other hand is as mortal as your 20-yar old dog.  So if you really want to do soemthing, do it now! Your ideea is not the kind of thing to preserve on a shelf until you find the time to develop it.

The coolest thing about inspiration is that it gives you the impetus of a 6-year old. Inspiration is like a time machine. It’s simply miraculos, it arises your productivity and it motivates you like never before. So start working and stop compalining.