Yes, yes, you’ve heard it before, but brace yourselves anyway, Halloween is coming. And as Game of Thrones is currently more popular than milk at a cat pub-crawl or Willy Wonka’s chocolate for curiously addicted kids, it’s safe to assume that you might just have to think of some Game of Thrones Halloween costumes to wear.
Whether you’ll be the one to lure your friends into Westeros by hosting a GoT party, or whether you get sucked into it almost against your will (hey, it’s been known to happen), it doesn’t matter. The end result is that you’ll have to get your game on (of thrones, of course) and not let any of those up-starts out-do you.
There’s literally an avalanche of ready-to-buy Game of Thrones Halloween costumes, meaning a Daenerys Targaryen costume, Jon Snow costume, Jaime Lannister costume, Margaery Tyrell costume, Robb Stark costume or just about any GoT costume can be yours fast, even delivered to your door, if you have the money for it.
But, apart from the money required, there is a down-side to buying your costume. Namely, that everyone can and will do so, to save time and trouble thinking about what to do/wear. So you might end up discovering someone else with the same stock and bland version that you’re wearing.
Of course, it would be best if everybody could make their own Game of Thrones Halloween costumes. As high-fidelity as possible to the series.
However, if you’re not a die-hard cosplay expert or you simply don’t have the time to make your own elaborate Game of Thrones Khaleesi costume, fit for wearing on the series’ set among the recording cameras, that augments your soon to be world-renowned acting brilliance (which I know you’ve dreamed of at least once), don’t worry.
There are easy, minimum effort Game of Thrones Halloween costumes solutions that you can go for. And some of them are even witty and subtle, which will earn you favor with your Tyrion dressed, tall as hell, hulking geek friend who will appreciate your display of intelligence and oddball courage.
(Warning: Some spoilers ahead).
1. Witty Bastard
For example, you can take a white t-shirt, then a black marker (or special clothes paint or whatever you feel works best for you) and draw a rectangle with the word SAG-AFTRA on the first, top half (or first line) and ONE UNION on the bottom half/second line (SAG-AFTRA ONE UNION in a rectangle is the logo for the Screen Actor’s Guild-American Federation of Television and Radio Artists). Then write: “THIS AGREEMENT, made on the 31st of October, 2015 between HBO Inc., hereinafter called ‘Producer’ and Kit Harrington, hereinafter known as ‘Performer’…”
Now comes the fun part. If you think Jon Snow’s not dead and will return for season 6 (or is dead, but will return for season 6, wink wink), you can continue the above paragraph with “… attests to the extension of the original agreement between parties, for an additional term of: 1 season, commencing upon the expiration of the original term.” (of course, regarding the number of seasons, you can take your pick: 1, 3, 27…).
But. If you don’t think he’s coming back and is dead for good, you can simply leave the first paragraph as it is, alone, with suspension marks and just draw a diagonal red line over your whole t-shirt, to signify that the contract is terminated. You can even tear your t-shirt a bit to make it more dramatic.
2. Mellisandre’s Shadow Assassin
This one’s reeeeeeal easy, though considerably creepy. And I don’t mean that in the horror way, but in the hinting-at-intriguing-sexual-preferences, stalker, sort of way. Still, you’ve been warned so, if you still wanna do it, here’s how. Buy a black spandex full body suit (you’ll manage to find one; remember the above? intriguing. sexual. preferences).
Then, all you have to do is … smoke a lot. Like in the 3 packs per half hour range, which will probably kill you, so on second thought, don’t! Or if you really wanna go hardcore, tie a battery-powered smoke dispenser to your back (is there such a thing?). Which… might kill you if it suffers a malfunction or if you fall or something, so this might not be a good idea either. Perhaps you should forget about the smoke all-together and just get a plastic knife, act all assassin-y and trust in your friends’ imagination.
3. George R. R. Martin
Suspenders, shirt, sailor cap, beard. And you get to have the Game of Thrones costume to rule all Game of Thrones Halloween costumes. How hard can it be? Of course, there is the concern that the other party-goers will all stab you with blunt spoons until you succumb and croak like their favorite character that you mercilessly killed on a whim. But, hey, dontcha wanna live dangerously on Halloween?
4. Valar Morghulis
And speaking of that favorite character, a real easy get-up is to wear dirt-brown clothes and a green hat/head gear (or paint your hair green). Then figure out a way to tie a cross or a plastic/paper tombstone to your head and draw a skeleton (or a stick figure) in a tomb (or rectangle) on your chest and belly. Then write “Your favorite GoT character” above it. Done. You’ve simultaneously managed to complete your Halloween costume and guarantee the emotional breakdown of (at least) one of your friends. Or you can just take the old sheet-as-a-ghost act and write “Your favorite GoT character” on it. The principle remains the same.
5. Lazy badassery
I saved for last the absolute minimum-effort thing you can do. Just go however you like. No costume preparation at all. When your friends are hurt and dismayed that you didn’t deem it important to dignify them with a reciprocal involvement in their great initiative, simply smile at the most vocal of them and tell him her: “A man/a woman is wrong. A Faceless Man is many faced.”
Then watch admiration fill them as they realize they’ve just been served by none other than Jaqen H’ghar (among many other identities). If necessary, allay their final doubts by taking out a coin and twirling it about. You can even buy the a GoT coin replica from some places if you want to go the extra mile.
Oh and in the same vein of humor and subtlety, you can then stroll over to the pork dish and say: “Ah, yes. King Robert’s slayer. A man thinks a slice would be nice.”
Your Young Robert Baratheon attired buddy in the corner will either protest or chuckle heartily.