Billboards are great for giving us useful information as we drive by; such as what a burger looks like or what a giant person wearing underwear would look like. However, the worst billboards fails around also give us something to laugh at as we walk or drive past.
The Obesity Warning Billboard
There are certain billboards which should never be put next to each other. If your obese child sees these ones he might wonder whether to make a call to see if he qualifies for help or just head down for another burger from that oh so tempting dollar menu.
The Historic Billboard
Does anyone actually know what the hell went on in Portsmouth historically? It looks to me as though a trip to this place could lead to rather more action than you might expect from an historic boatyard. Having said that, the erotic sailor based action going on in the sign is probably just a promotional ploy and all you’ll find in Portsmouth are historic boats and stuff.
The Braille Billboard
This billboard fail is half genius and half unadultered stupidity. You see, it’s promoting a night of Stevie Wonder action and he’s, like, blind. So they put some words in Braille on the sign. So far so good but hang on a second; you need to touch the words in braille with your hands to understand them. Is this sign aimed at giant blind people who just sort of instinctively know that there is a bit of Braille up there while they go past it?
The Fat and Ugly Billboard
£16.99 per month seems a pretty decent price to stop being fat. How much would it cost me to stop being so god damned ugly as well? I just can’t resist those subtle marketing ploys which pray almost imperceptibly on my weak points.
The Carrot Billboard
I am hoping we can put this down to another badly placed billboard. If not, then the Sweat Zone takes on a completely different meaning. The idea of quenching your thirst with a giant carrot is also somewhat worrying in its own right. Rarely – if ever – have I felt the need to reach for a carrot when my throat gets dry.
The Cat Jesus
I can’t make out the words on the cat billboard but I assume that he is a heretic moggie who is viciously mocking Jesus. What are those cats like?
The Obvious Billboard
You would think that the person who came up with this billboard fail did it on purpose. Maybe they did. It is hard to believe that any sane person could design this and think that it would give passersby anything other than a laughing fit.
The Poor English Billboard
I admire the searing honesty of this billboard. Go to our restaurant and get great Asian food but don’t expect us to understand a blooming word you say. Since it’s a buffet it doesn’t really matter I guess. You just need to be able to ruthlessly elbow people out of the way in order to get the most succulent pieces of chicken satay and you’ll go home happy.
The Carnivorous Billboard
It’s not exactly subtle is it? A passing vegetarian could suffer a nasty shock when they see this billboard fail.